You Know What?

Hi, Hey, Hello!

You know what I need to be? Better organised.

I’m efficient, I think. When something needs to be done I get it done pretty quickly (once I have stopped procrastinating, obviously) and it’s done to the best of my ability (again, obviously). But most of the time my head is a mess.

It’s a jumble of all things: what do I need to do, what is the best way to go about doing them, when do they need doing by, did I put my glasses in the case in my bag, how many hours sleep did I have, should I make myself a coffee or not, did I remember to take something out of the freezer for dinner this morning, did I pick my keys up from the table and put them in my bag before I walked out the door, what kind of music do I want to listen to right now, what the hell do I want for lunch, have I put the dishwasher on, what is that song lyric that will not leave my head, is this idea I have original or is it something that I have absorbed from life, I should really tidy my room and get rid of some clothes, I really need to take this nail varnish off and paint them again, do I have a blog post ready for tomorrow, do I even have an idea for a blog post tomorrow? And so on and so forth.

It’s a mess.

I would have flashes of becoming super duper organised throughout various points of my school life but they would dwindle out almost as quickly as they came to me. There would be bullet points for the tasks that I need to do for each day and I would tick them off as and when I did them. The whole week would be tentatively planned (this mainly happened during uni tbh because I had 11 hours contact time, I would have just slept and watched Netflix all day otherwise) and I would reference it throughout the day to keep myself in check.

But then I would miss something on the list and it would roll on over to the next day and then I would start behind and the it would snowball and before I knew it I am was writing the MUST DO things on a Post-it note and sticking it in plain sight and letting the mess clutter up again.

And the mess always sticks for longer than the organised.

Which is something that I really need to change. Something that yesterday afternoon I even made a step to try and change, I felt super organised as I made the smallest of baby steps into a world where there is a bit less mess. But even as I made that step there was a part of me that was taking bets (with myself) as to how long that was going to last. I was thinking about how it probably won’t last to the end of the year, and whether I actually hit send on that email I was supposed to send, did I reply to that text I got a while ago, and also that other email that I was gonna reply to, I have nothing to post for tomorrow or on Wednesday because I spent my Sunday doing things that were not setting up posts in a busy week for me, this green juice I’m drinking really isn’t that great, kinda like the bagel I had for breakfast, what is this song playing right now, is the dishwasher running? and so on.

See? Mess. Always.

I am gonna get better at it though. I am working to get better at it. At a snail’s pace to be fair, but at a pace nonetheless.

And I am really gonna tidy my room soon…ish.

Parentheses count: 4. See you tomorrow!

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Sophie, twenty-something, avid reader, writer, really good at watching whole seasons of TV shows in one weekend and using 10 words where 5 will do, overzealous user of the ellipsis and parentheses, starts too many sentences with ‘and’ and ‘so’, living in a continual state of Wanderlust.

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