Hi, Hey, Hello!
Re-charging is important.
It is the most important element of helping me at least deal with my mental health. It’s what my weekends are for. It’s what my evenings are for. It’s the one thing that kind of remains non-negotiable for me now.
It didn’t use to be.
But that way lay madness and burn outs and they made everything all the worse and they felt more draining then anything else. For a long period of time it felt like I was just running on empty and somehow making it through life. I really do not know how I did it, but I did and that in some kind of sick way feels like a win for me.
It was a win though.
It was really damn depressing.
And it was that very long period of time (like at least 2 years of it being really bad and then about year of it being pretty shitty but less soul destroying than before) that really highlighted to me just how important re-charging was.
It used to be just having super lazy days where I would spend all morning in bed and then would roll out, shower, put on super comfy clothes and then just lay about on the sofa passing the time. That used to work for me. Switching off completely from the world and then going back into it on Monday.
Yeah, that is no longer the case.
Don’t get me wrong, re-charging is still sometimes just binge watching a whole TV show in a weekend (hello Queer Eye, which I actually did in a Sunday afternoon…) but that usually only comes after I’ve got a proper sweat on in the morning. It comes after I’ve gotten lost in the world of the book I am reading on my way to and from the gym. It happens after I’ve had a proper refuel on some really good food and a coffee. It happens after I’ve got some writing done.
It sets up the day differently for me in my head when the days that I have to myself are also productive as well as being kinda lazy. It’s not that I feel like I need to ‘earn’ being lazy, but it just means that I don’t finish the weekend feeling like I just wasted it. I was outside, I got a workout in. I did all that stuff and filled my time with other things except just learning what it truly feels like to be only horizontal.
It weirdly doesn’t always feel like I could use another weekend when I get to work on Monday (I mean there is a part of me that does feel like that, but really who doesn’t sometimes?). I do feel like I got to reset a little and it also means that I can make my weekend sound a bit more exciting then just saying that I slept and watched Netflix.
Parentheses count: 3. See you tomorrow!
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